Our Psychiatrist M.Chauvin has had a few problems over the years

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This was a story about some friends of ours, after I  learned the art of Paintshop Pro !!!!!

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There can often be problems with old folks.  Some old people sleep OK but some are all wobbly and stupid.  My advice would be to get rid of them quick before they start wetting the bed and stuff like that.  You know I'm quite old myself now, and I still don't really see what people over about thirty do with their lives - it's just a pointless routine.  Why don't they just push off and leave us to it!

Come to that, I don't really like children either, so they might as well go. Teenagers are just horrible, so I'd vote to dump the lot.  I suppose I really don't like other blokes too much - after all they only clog up the bar and pinch your bird.  I'd keep  a few mates and little skinny stupid blokes to serve us.  I think that leaves just young women - I don't mind them at all, but I don't really want the ugly ones.  I don't really want plain ones either, or foreigners. And they can't be cleverer than me. I don't like them too small, or too big either--and no fat legs!

Apart from that, I think I'm a pretty broadminded guy!

(Editor's note: our resident Psychiatrist M. Chauvin is now on a refresher course, we don't expect him back for some time)

-A Psychiatrist Writes

'I can't believe it!'puzzled wife Greta told us today.  ' Mike won a bit of money on the lottery and asked me what he should do with it. I said I thought we needed  new knockers on our doors'  Greta added ' he looked a bit thoughtful, then went out.  He came back a week later with these things!'  She shook her head and continued ' I know  his hearing's going a bit, but this is ridiculous!' .  At first very upset, Greta has now become resigned to

Mike's New Knockers

the idea.  She sees many opportunities ' Mike has discovered himself' she said, ' and he can hardly leave himself alone'.  Mike himself spoke today about his experience 'Well, I thought it was a good idea, but obviously I misunderstood what Greta said.  But I'm used to it now. I'm very popular with my pals at squash, and I feel more,... well. .. more'. We asked if Mike's new knockers had  come between the couple ' not recently' said Mike ruefully, ' but I'm hoping'.  Greta broke in to add ' Well it's certainly one in the eye for the neighbours - I'm just grateful that I didn't say anything to Mike about new  knobs for the doors - just imagine what he could have done!' At that point, Greta broke off, and wandered away with a thoughtful look in her eye.